Ten Commandments

1. No one can present himself directly to another of our friends. There must be a third person to do it.
2. Never look at the wives of friends.
3. Never be seen with cops.
4. Don't go to pubs and clubs.
5. Always being available for Cosa Nostra is a duty - even if your wife is about to give birth.
6. Appointments must absolutely be respected.
7. Wives must be treated with respect.
8. When asked for any information, the answer must be the truth.
9. Money cannot be appropriated if it belongs to others or to other families.
10. People who can't be part of Cosa Nostra: anyone who has a close relative in the police, anyone with a two-timing relative in the family, anyone who behaves badly and doesn't hold to moral values.

source: wikipedia.org

Fallout (the famous line in the game)

War. War never changes.
The Romans waged war to gather slaves and wealth.
Spain built an empire from its lust for gold and territory.
Hitler shaped a battered Germany into an economic superpower.
But war never changes.
In the 21st century, war was still waged over the resources that could be acquired.
Only this time, the spoils of war were also its weapons.
Petroleum and uranium.
For these resources, China would invade Alaska, the US would annex Canada, and the European Commonwealth would dissolve into quarreling, bickering nation-states, bent on controlling the last remaining resources on Earth.
In 2077, the storm of world war had come again.
In two brief hours, most of the planet was reduced to cinders.
And from the ashes of nuclear devastation, a new civilization would struggle to arise.
A few were able to reach the relative safety of the large underground Vaults.
Your family was part of the group that entered Vault Thirteen.
Imprisoned safely behind the large Vault door, under a mountain of stone, a generation has lived without knowledge of the outside world.
Life in the Vault is about to change .

Facts about SEX

1 ) 94% of men lie about their penis size.
According to condom manufacturers, only 6% of
men use extra large condoms.

2) The average man is 5 inches long when erect
(no matter what you have heard ladies, that's the
truth).

3) 80% of American men are circumsized. Even
though Pediatrics say it is not necessary.

4) No matter what all the ads say, nothing can
make your penis grow but time (most men reach
the end of their growth by the early 20's)

5) There is no correlation between penis size and
shoe size, hand size, or nose size.

6) Blue balls does exist! It's technically
called "prostatic congestion."

7) Only 16% of men shave their privates.

+Some stuff on the ladies+
------------------------------

1) Only 9% of women around the globe consider
themselves "attractive" (20% of British women
do).
43% of women use the term "natural", 24% say
they have "average" looks, 8% prefer the
term "feminine", 7% say they are "good looking",
and 7% say they are "cute", and finally only 2% of
women say they are "sexy".

2) An estimated 85% of women wear the wrong
size bra.
3) 60% of women have had breast implants.
4) 75% of women dont like oral sex
5) 95% of women shave their privates.

+Both+
--------------------------------
1) Masturbation is healthy for both men and
women.

2) 70% of highschoolers have had sex before
they have graduated. 27% loose their virginity
senior
prom night. Only 3% wait until marriage.

3) 95% of men would have sex with a girl after 1
month of dating. Only 10% of women feel this way.

+5 Reasons Why Sex is Good+
---------------------------------------------
1) It is a good workout. Sex burns about 150
calories every half an hour of it. It will lower your
cholesterol and improve breathing circulation.

2) You won't get sick. According to research if
you have sex 1-2 times a week you are less likely
to
get sick.

3) You'll feel happier. You will feel a greater sense
of well-being. Women who have more sex were
clinically proven to be less depressed than women
who dont have sex.

4) Makes you look better - [ problem is, ugly people
don`t get any ]. Sex releases hormones in your
which make your skin and hair softer and shinier
and tone your physique.

5) (The best reason) You will live longer. Studies
prove that sex makes you live longer. Men who
had sex 1-2 times a week had half the death rate
as those who did not indulge themselves at least
once a month. It also makes you look younger. If
you have sex 3 times a week you may look up to
10 years younger than you really are.

Did You Know?
----------------------------------------
1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds up
to running 75 miles!!!!

4 Stages of Man's Life

Buona sera boys,

Today, we're gonna talk about growing up.

As we get older, we start to look back at our lives and wonder, what if? What if I had scored that broad? What if I had placed that bet? What if I had whacked that stool pigeon when I had the chance? Why didn't I ask my nonna for her secret tomato sauce recipe while she was alive? What if I had iced that damn Brazilian national soccer team before the '94 World Cup Final [Italy lost the final in penalties]?

But I'm going to let you in on a little secret. No matter how many "what if" scenarios you play out in that small head of yours, you'll always have regrets in life because you'll never appreciate what you have until it's too late. Why? Simple. Because we go through stages, stages in which we change from boys to men, and eventually to grumpy old men who act like boys again.

where do you fit in?

Those stages are the real schools of life, no matter what that fancy piece of crap Ivy League diploma says. Why is this important for you to remember? Because if you don't realize what stage of life you're in, you won't know when it's time to speak and when it's time to listen.

For example, one of the biggest problems in La Cosa Nostra are our younger associates, who will go to whatever lengths to make their mark but often get too cute for their (and their fingers) good. I might have a few young turks in my famiglia who are in the first life stages of their existence and who think that opening their traps and taking a stand for what they believe in is the smart way to do business. It's their way to get into the books. The school of life will one day make them realize that they're one mistake away from ending up in cement shoes, and on that day they'll come to realize that in "our thing," you have to pick your words carefully.

Hopefully for my young soldiers, that one mistake won't cost them their lives. And if they are lucky enough to still have the use of their jaws, they can start asking smart questions instead of saying stupidities.

Stage 1 - Young, dumb & full of impulses
In this stage: You think with your heart.
Your mentor: Nobody.

The first stage of life lasts for approximately the first 25 years of your life. In this stage, you're far from being a man. Everything you do is reckless and not planned out. You're a risk taker because you don't know how dangerous the risks are. You don't think about the consequences of your actions.

You think of your needs, your desires. You're a selfish bastard. You have no need or respect for authority. Worse, you think you know everything there is to know about life, yet you know niente . You could be smart, but you're not smart enough -- you're a stronzo . You're blinded by your inexperience and stupidity. You chase skirts like a baboon. You're a kid in a candy store.

What should you be doing in this stage? Keeping your mouth shut and learning from others. Plain and simple. You will fall down. Just make sure you're falling down a flight of stairs, not the Grand Canyon. Be smart about your risks because burning people you might need in the future is not smart. Cement friendships, cement loyalties. You're too dumb and stupid to orchestrate a revolution; learn what you need to know to do that in your next stage of life. Stay ambitious, but have a plan for that ambition. Find a good housewife who will clean and cook for you... you need a strong foundation.

Biggest strength: You're fearless and ambitious.
Biggest weakness: You think you know it all, yet you don't even know your own elbow.

Stage 2 - Older, smarter, but not wise yet
In this stage: You think with your heart and brain.
Your mentor: People who have accomplished what you want to achieve.

The second stage of life starts when things just start to "click." Things that weren't clear before suddenly come into focus.

You start to understand how the world works and realize that only the guys with power and money mean anything because they control all the chips in the world. In the game of life, they're always the players at the table who make the decisions.

You realize that life is a game, and that even though there are rules, it is those who bend them to the extreme who get ahead in life. And at times, if there are no rules in the game, that's okay too, and you learn how to play along. You realize the world is great but corrupt, and you must adapt.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, you're still in Stage 1, even if your driver's license says you were born in 1952. Those who know what I'm talking about know that I don't need to explain what these "rules" are. There is no damn instruction booklet you get on your 30th birthday. They know what they are because they understand the ways of the world. It's all about the "click" theory. Capisce ? No? Wait a few years.

At this point in your life, you've come to appreciate and respect the need for structure, for authority. You begin to fear things; fear the risk of failure, fear the consequences of actions, fear not being right. But it doesn't stop you from trying to execute your ambition. You're just smarter about how you accomplish your goals. You still love women, but you don't chase them anymore. By now you've picked the three women in your life: your wife, your mistress, and your girlfriend. I sound like a freaking horoscope over here.

What should you be doing in this stage? You should still be learning and listening, but now you're taking action too. You realize that you're not going to be a trainee for life; you will be a student and then become a teacher. You start figuring things out and start delivering results. This is the enlightenment stage of your life and you revel in the chance to fulfill your destiny as a man. (Now I really like sound like a testa di merda with all this philosophy crap.)

Most importantly, you stop being a cafone . You don't make dumb mistakes anymore. You make smart mistakes.

Biggest strength: You come to realize that you're a student, and life is your teacher.
Biggest weakness: You're still not a complete man; your legacy is unclear.

Stage 3 - The wise, older man
In this stage: You think with your brain.
Your mentor: No one, you're the mentor.

The third stage of life occurs when you have acquired wisdom. If you haven't reached this stage by your 50th birthday, move to Boca Raton now and buy yourself a dozen pair of white knee socks, and get the hell out of my way on the parkway.

The third stage is the greatest stage in life because this is where you come to terms with what you have and haven't accomplished in life. You accept your shortcomings and failures, and enjoy your victories. You're now ready to pass your wisdom and life experience on to others.

You're always learning, but now you do it because you enjoy it, not because you need it. You become a teacher. You're no longer a wise guy, you're a wise man . You don't have time for BS anymore. You don't need to be a shylock anymore; you're a don.

At this point, you've learned and mastered all the lessons I've written about in my articles. Everything makes sense; you understand how everything in life works. Best of all, mistakes disappear, and you ration your words so that when you speak, everyone listens. You command respect and deserve it.

This is where you have the opportunity to be cocky; to say "I know it all." But of course you're too smart to do that. You stop fearing death -- you accept it. You realize that you won't master Latin, but you come to accept that too and deal with what you do know.

What should you be doing in this stage? I don't have to tell you, you know. Life is good.

Biggest strength: You are wise. You are made.
Biggest weakness: You don't take many risks. But who needs to take risks when you have a Filipina mistress and a house in Arizona next to a golf course?

Stage 4 - The bitter, old man
In this stage: You don't think with your brain, you're senile.
Your mentor: Frank Sinatra.

The fourth stage in life is a sad stage because you start regressing. You can't go up, you can't become wiser, so you go down and get stupid again. Despite your wisdom, despite your experience, despite what you accomplished, the consensus is you did that back when people didn't have refrigerators. Your wisdom and your understanding of the way of the world become outdated.

You become irrelevant and you can't stand it because you were once so respected. So you become bitter and start bitching about it, like a kid. At its worst, you reverse your growth and go back to having the same characteristics of the young fool. You become emotional, irrational, "no one shows me respect, no one cares about me, back in the old days we knew what it was like to suffer," etc.

You fear no one (except guys in white jackets) because you have Alzheimer's. You still teach, but people don't listen like they used to. If you were the Boss of your "family," you become the retired boss, a symbolic figurehead because someone else is calling the shots and you haven't finished writing up your will yet. You start chasing skirts again -- nurses with skirts.

What should you be doing in this stage? What does it matter? You're going to die soon. Here's a tip; don't pee on the carpet when you visit your daughter-in-law.

Biggest strength: You likely become an intermediary in disputes. You will be sought out for your unbiased (if outdated) opinion.
Biggest weakness: You're becoming irrelevant and don't know it.

take the stage

That's it, the four stages of life. Know which one you are in. When you're in Stage 1, listen and shut up. In Stage 2, listen and learn, but act. In Stage 3, use your wisdom. In Stage 4, shut up and don't break anything when you go to someone's house.

Watch your backs and keep your noses clean.

Art of Negotiation

Let's get one thing straight -- negotiation is an art; an art few can talk about with any authority, an art even fewer can master. I'd be a very, very rich man if I got a dollar for every bozo out there who has come to me while I'm sipping my espresso telling me he's a master negotiator because he got 20 cents off a pound of bananas or negotiated free rubber carpets at a car dealership.

Give me a freaking break.

Negotiation, real negotiation, involves more than saving a few bucks. It involves getting something in return for something else, giving up as little as possible to get said "else" in return. Done properly, both parties come out happy. Done wrong, everyone leaves with a sour taste in their mouth like they've just done it with a 50-year-old hooker at the local brothel.

I was in a jewelry store recently looking for my latest pinkie ring (yeah, what a cliché) when I saw some young turk trying to negotiate down the price of a watch he obviously was very interested in buying. He was being arrogant, he was BSing, and he was annoying the store manager. In the end, he bought the watch (like I knew he would), yet he pissed off the entire sales staff so much that regardless of the fact that he plucked down a few grand for a few nuts and bolts, he has absolutely no goodwill in that store (in case he needs a favor later on, like fixing something for free or selling back the engagement ring from his two-timing fiancée).

He did everything wrong, from bluffing, to being rude, not shutting up, making excessive demands (free maintenance for five years), to insisting on the store lowering the price even after they settled on a "final" price, and most importantly, not even hinting that he was willing to walk away. (He threatened to leave the store, but never took his hands off the glass display case -- why don't you make it more obvious, you stronzo, that you're desperate?)

So he inspired me to come up with a refresher course for you guys on negotiation. I've covered it before, but here are some basic tenets everyone should memorize like the Hail Mary. Remember these tips, tattoo them on your forehead, whatever. Just don't come back to me and tell me to help you because you just got fleeced on a negotiation, thinking imitating Al Capone was enough to get you a good deal.

1- Never make the first offer
Simple enough, isn't it? As much as you can, in whatever negotiation context you are in, never make the first offer. See where the other guy is coming from, and you can get a very clear sense of how much he wants the deal done. If the other party comes in with a great offer, it shows you they are desperate to close. A highball offer indicates they can stand to see you walk away. Use this first offer to gauge your opponent's intentions.

2- Have two people play off each other
There is nothing that brings you leverage as quickly as having two parties that want the same thing from you. Whether it's in business, in life or in love, having two people wanting you will raise your loot. Whenever possible, have a framework of a deal in place with at least two parties so you can play them off each other (and play into the things they deem most valuable).

3- Aim reasonably high
Always ask for more than you are willing to settle for, but never so high that you are dismissed from the table. The key is to always remain at the negotiation table. So don't insult anyone and offer something with so little value, they have no choice but to reject your offer and think you are a cafone.

4- Never look impressed or eager
Poker face, boys. No matter how sweet the offer, no matter if they've offered you more than you want, never break out the smirk. That's a nice little way to show your cards, your underwear, and your dirty magazine collection. Always stay cool, stay calm, and save the loud "Yes!" scream and Fred Astaire kick dance for when you leave the room.

5- Always be willing to walk away
No matter how badly you want a deal, no matter how much you are willing to cooperate and give up to close a deal, be willing to walk away at any time. It's the toughest thing you might have to do in negotiation, but be aware of the option if your gut is telling you to walk. If it doesn't "smell" right, take a hike before you're unable to shake off the stench of a rotten deal.

6- Assume the other guy needs you
The toughest part of negotiation is figuring out how badly the other guy needs you. The psychological effect of thinking the other guy has options will likely lower your confidence level during the tougher parts of your negotiation, when your intestinal fortitude gets tested. Always imagine in your mind that the other guy wants what you have, whether it's your business, your money or your time. Always assume it or you'll lose your edge when you are slamming your fist on the table.

7- Play good cop, bad cop
Unless you are negotiating for yourself or on behalf of someone and have significant personal gains on the table, always use the "good cop, bad cop" routine. Being the good cop in negotiations allows you to retain goodwill while you are driving a hard bargain on behalf of or with the bad cop (who would ideally be absent from the meeting).
It's always great to have a fallback guy when you're pushing for a difficult concession, or when you make a negotiation mistake and have to pull the "didn't get approval" routine. It's always easier to negotiate something on behalf of someone else than yourself because when it's for you, your emotions wreak havoc on the process.

8- Learn to remain silent
Sometimes, when an offer is being made or a proposal is put in front of you, it's important to not say anything. Keep your mouth shut for 30 seconds, 90 seconds, an hour. Whatever. Create an uncomfortable silence, and the other side (more often than not) will try to break it by offering more details. Stay quiet -- you don't have to walk away, just reflect on what is being said or at least pretend you are.

9- Research your opponent
Whether it's knowing the other guy's past deals, what's going on in the marketplace, or studying the product or service you are negotiating, always know what you are talking about. The kid in the watch store (from my previous story) made a ton of mistakes, but he knew his product like the back of his hand (which showed how badly he wanted this watch). The store employee couldn't BS the kid about the product, or use a sales pitch of air instead of substance, which is the only salvation this kid had from being slaughtered by seasoned negotiators (jewelry guys are kings in this area).

10- Never give up on the core of your deal
In negotiations, concessions are always made. But no matter how much you concede to close the deal, the core of what is important to you in a deal should not be waived. Conceding on these core issues will significantly sour the deal and make you a very unhappy idiot.

11- Always be polite
No matter how badly someone low-balls you, no matter how many salamis they are asking for to fix your backyard fence, never lose your cool and start talking about the other guy's mother. Don't be a jerk and don't curse out the other guy. You gain nothing but contempt and you torpedo precious goodwill that's needed when concessions need to be made. Raise the stakes too much, puff out your chest, and any hope of progress during a stalemate goes out the window.

leave it to the pros
You can read this article backwards and forwards, up and down, left and right, and still not come close to mastering negotiation. So, here is a last piece of advice that will likely be more valuable than anything I just said: When in doubt, or caught over your head, get a pro to negotiate for you. It could be a seasoned lawyer, an experienced colleague, or Tony Two Toes. Just don't do it yourself if you gulp every time you make a demand. A great negotiator never blinks first.

Dealing With Your Enemies

Enemies, enemies, enemies. From all the e-mail I get asking me about how to deal with them, how to deceive them, how to destroy them, and how to ruin their homemade tomato sauce, I got to figure there are thousands of little conquerors out there causing a lot of damage I didn't know about, because I can't get how so many people have so many enemies.

I've mentioned that the key to dealing with enemies is to destroy them, leaving no room for retaliation. This is best said by Machiavelli: "For it must be noted, that men must either be caressed or else annihilated; they will revenge themselves for small injuries, but cannot do so for great ones; the injury therefore that we do to a man must be such that we need not fear his revenge."

That said, I'm a practical kind of guy, and I know that not everyone is in the type of situation where annihilating enemies is possible, as it might be in my Famiglia .

So, sometimes you can't send your enemies packing to hell's gates, you can't make a deposit in the East River, and you can't offer someone the gift of cement shoes. Sometimes, you have to deal with cafones that make your life miserable, because circumstances (and maybe the law too) don't let you ice your headaches.

For those circumstances, let me give you a quick rundown on how to deal with opponents when destroying them is not an option:

1- Make time to plan your revenge
If, for whatever reason, you have to wait because the consequences of immediate action against your enemy outweigh the benefits, use that time to perfect your plan to destroy him or seek revenge. Make your plans bolder, colder, crueler, and use the time to make your enemy feel a false sense of security before the dump truck falls on his head. Don't sulk and complain. Think of it as an opportunity to fine-tune your master plan.

2- Don't publicize your beefs
Nothing brings your enemies out of the woodwork faster than a public act of disrespect. Deal with your enemy smartly by revealing your beefs only to your closest circle of associates. You never know whose ears your enemy has. You don't want more eyes on the street watching out for you. So keep your mouth shut, and don't go making empty threats.

3- Don't let them get to you
Always remain cool. Don't let yourself get distracted from everything else you have going on in your life. Don't let your business go down the toilet. Don't neglect the wife or the mistress. Don't run around scared like a little girl. Don't let your enemy get under your skin. Pick your battles wisely. But don't let yourself be disrespected either. Sure,

you can't go blowing your temper at every little provocation, but there is a line for everyone. As long as the line is not crossed (even if it's stepped on), stay cool.

4- Keep them close
When you can't annihilate your enemies, join them. Sort of. Let them think you are joining them. Befriend them. Get closer. There is no easier way to keep tabs on your fiercest opponent than to be right next to him. I'd rather see the barrel of a gun in front of me than wonder if it's behind me all the time. Same applies to your enemies.

why do you have enemies?

Now it's fine and dandy to know how to get rid of your nemeses (or contain them when planting them six feet under is not on the agenda). But you also have to ask yourself a fundamental question: Why do I have these enemies in the first place?

Eliminating the enemies you have also means making less of them in the first place. It's always easier not to have any enemies than it is to wipe out several of them. Blood is very expensive. You want to avoid any drawn out vendettas. It's distracting, it's exhausting, and it can be deadly. Why take a pill for a headache when it's easier to avoid the headache in the first place?

If you find yourself always drawing enemies, you have to ask yourself what it is you do to draw so many beefs with so many people. Understanding the kind of enemies you have will help you minimize them. If you run a successful and lucrative business, there is very little you can do to avoid having adversaries. If you live by yourself on a mountain and people want to nuke your property, maybe you got the problem, not them. Determine if the reason for having enemies is justifiable and inevitable (i.e. a competitive industry), or is caused by your personality.

lose enemies that are annoying

Last piece of advice: Keep enemies that are at your level. Those not at your level aren't worth your time. If you are a BOSS of a big company, your only enemies should be guys who have other billion-dollar corporations or the possibility of buying small islands or companies, not the guy in the mailroom.

No matter how many times the janitor urinates on your Mercedes, don't make him your enemy; you don't have time for that kind of crap.

The same goes if you have a beef with someone higher up on the food chain than you, like the President of the United States. He doesn't have time for your nonsense, his enemies have tanks and jet planes, not the "power" of pen and paper. Pick on a guy your own size, don't waste your time plotting against people who don't consider you their enemies.

Watch your backs and keep your noses clean.

6 Traits of a Ruthless Man

Buona sera boys.

There are many ways to get what you want. You can be Mr. Nice Guy and ask, "please, please, with a cherry on top." You can be a whiner and complain like a finocchio until you get your way. Or, you can be the bad guy and take what you want or stop at nothing to achieve your goals. Basically, be ruthless, my preferred way.

Now let's get one thing straight. Being ruthless is not going to make you loved and admired. It won't even get you respect. It will, though, make you focused and, more importantly, feared. That, my friends, isn't necessarily a bad thing. People ask if it's better to be feared or loved, and the answer is always the same: feared. It lasts longer than love.

Being ruthless in business accomplishes things. Especially when a guy is behind on his payments. But don't mistake ruthlessness with being a tyrant. Being ruthless means you take no prisoners, you develop a killer instinct, but you are consistent in your fierceness. There's nothing worse than a bad arse who changes his mind every time the wind blows east. That's not being ruthless, it's being a lunatic.

So let's look at what you need to do to be ruthless:

1- Leave emotions at the door
When you're ruthless, you have to make decisions without feelings. Emotions cloud your judgment. They weaken you when it comes to the people you like. When you decide to be ruthless in business or in your personal life, emotions should go out the window. Don't bend the rules for no one; be consistent in your actions.

If you get hired for a job and your first order is to fire half your staff, you have to be cold and calculating. Eliminate the useless employees. You wouldn't keep a guy who doesn't know his arse from his elbow in business but bakes you cookies every Friday, just because you think he's a stand-up guy.

This emotional detachment applies to all aspects of business. If your enemy is weak, show no compassion and use the opportunity to destroy him. When you're ruthless and aggressive, you have to make tough decisions. It's going to take brass balls; you don't have time to worry about feelings. Remorse exits your brain forever.

You never apologize. You don't have pity. You don't feel sorry for no one. Why should you? It's business, not personal, and if the other guy doesn't understand that, what the hell do you care?

If you tolerate idiots or forgive anyone, you might as well just cut off your balls right now, little girl.

2- No tolerance for incompetence
Someone who's ruthless wants to be surrounded by people that can execute his vision. A ruthless person needs to be surrounded by intelligent people if he wants to get things done. When you're ruthless, you have no tolerance or patience for stupid people.

Get rid of waste immediately. If someone is too stupid to think before they act, they don't deserve respect or dignity -- so get rid of them. You're only as strong as your weakest link, so don't let stronzos get in the way of your ambition. Zero tolerance.

3- Never forgive
Forgiveness makes you weak. Ruthless people don't understand the meaning of forgiveness. You can't ever forgive idiocy, betrayal or disloyalty. Someone screws up, they're gone, fired, out of your life. No excuses, no explanations. Forgiving someone always leaves the door open for others to betray you as well (after all, you are Mr. Softy Pants who gets all mushy and forgives everyone after a little sucky-sucky ).

4- Punish quickly & brutally
Beyond not forgiving someone for treachery or infidelity, you need to make an example of those responsible to ensure that it doesn't happen again. Your reaction to being betrayed has to be consistent, quick, and it has to be heartless enough that it sends a clear message to others: Don't f*ck with me.

What's important here is that you punish in a consistent manner. If you like putting guys in cement shoes when they screw you over, do it across the board. Don't make an exception for the cafone you caught sleeping with your wife and give him the "extra treatment." That's letting emotions rule.

If you delay your punishment, like the Count of Monte Cristo, you defeat the purpose of punishing someone. If your dog eats the plate of cannoli you've been looking forward to all day, plotting revenge and hitting him out of the blue three weeks later isn't going to send the message, "Don't ever touch my freakin' cannoli again, you stinking mutt."

5- Instill fear in others
Whether you do it by your actions, by your words, by hiring some muscle, or by carrying a Beretta, instill fear in others. They are more likely to surrender if they fear you. And when you want to take over the world, you want to get there as quickly as possible, and with as little bloodshed as possible. Blood is a big expense. Turn those around you into the French, and they'll surrender like patsies.

6- Stay focused & determined
When you aim to be ruthless, you have to stick to it all the way. And if you have a "master plan" to go along with your ruthlessness, make sure you never forget it.

If you want to build the largest garbage disposal company in the world, focus on destroying or buying out all those that stand in your way.

That's it, that's all. So go out there and make your mark, just don't turn into Mussolini. He failed because he failed at two things I mentioned: he let his emotions get the best of him and he lost focus. If you want to be a brutal, egomaniacal dictator that stays in power for a long time, just read my freakin' article. I'll send you a bill later. Capisce ?

12 Ways Men Became Sissies & Whiners

The world has changed a lot since I was a little boy. Sure, we've moved ahead as a society in certain things, we've evolved, we've gone to the moon, we have all this technology crap, but in the end we've taken more than a few steps back as far as human nature is concerned.

When I was growing up, a man's word was his life, a man's honor his most important virtue, and a man's ability to be real his most pressing social concern.

Things, unfortunately, have changed.

And here's some news, boys: the ladies agree with me. Women have noticed the feminization of men too, and despite what you might hear about the sensitive New Age clowns being the ideal Romeos women are looking for, it's total bull crap. Women want a man who will act like a man, who will take charge, who can make decisions, who doesn't cry, and who faces fear.

1- Men quit easily
It used to be that a man had to have two bullets in his head to quit whatever he was doing. Men used to be tough and not look for the exit door every time things got rough. Now, at the first sign of trouble, men put up their hands and say "I quit," instead of fighting the tough battle. It's easy to say "I quit," but the real champions are the ones who stay in the battle. Whether it's stress at work or a relationship that has hit some bumps, quitting when faced with adversity has become too popular and too easy for too many men.

2- Men can't handle criticism
Remember the expression "take it like a man"? Remember when men could take an order and not cry about their feelings being disrespected? Remember when military training was mandatory and anyone who complained about waking up at 4 a.m. would end up scrubbing toilets with their tongues? Well, so do I. Men used to be able to take a punch, take a knock, take criticism. That's before becoming bruttas. Now every time someone says something critical that isn't sugar-coated with girly fairy dust, all hell breaks loose, and the tears start to roll. So what if your boss tells you you're an idiot -- maybe you are. Can we please get back to being able to handle a little disapproval?

3- Men complain
Remember when Don Corleone said to his godson, "You can act like a man! [Slap] What's the matter with you?" You aren't the only one. It struck a chord with a whole generation because it summed up what whining, bitching, moaning fools we've become. Complaints come left and right nowadays -- coffee is too cold, service not fast enough, distance too far. Shut the hell up. Hand in your testicoli now and go buy a bra. Accept that life isn't perfect and move on. When I hear about some clown launching a sexual harassment lawsuit against some female colleague, I want to hunt down the guy and take him to Lucca's Meat Market to show him what real sexual harassment is. We've become rompipalles (ball breakers). We've become selfish pigs, not doing anything without selfish gain.

4- Men groom like women
I'm all for a good manicure and proper hygiene, but let's get one thing straight -- I will never wax anything off my body that God intended to have there. I am not going to go to a fancy girly spa to get some algae crap on my face. Look clean, iron your clothes, anything else leave to you mother-in-law.

5- Men talk about their feelings
I love this one. Men all of a sudden have "feelings" others need to hear about. It's not enough that men are crying, they now must "express" themselves. It's not enough to say "are you going to marry me and cook me a meal every night," now guys have to recite Othello and tell their women in a 30-minute speech why he should be whipped by his significant other for the rest of his life. Asking a woman if she loves you or if you satisfy her is pathetic.

6- Men side with feminists
Anyone who knows me knows how much I love feminists, so when I see men yelling for social and workplace equality, Girl Power and the Spice Girls, I just start vomiting. Being macho has become a dirty word. Having good old-fashioned values like thinking men should be the breadwinners and the decision makers, and thinking women should raise the children and manage the home front, are condemned as damning to today's moral fabric. Where did it all go wrong?

7- Men embrace unmanly trends
Being a metrosexual, meditating, being a vegan, being anti-spider killing, being a stronzo, a Tom Cruise fan, whatever, all people who follow any of these things should be gathered up, put on an island north of Siberia, and allowed to pursue their interests in the comfort of their fellow sissy males.

8- Men are useless
Our forefathers could build a house that lasted for 200 years with their bare hands, nowadays men can't even put up a shelf without reading a 200-page manual. Sure, there are still Luigi and Mario who can build you a nice five-bedroom house in five days, but most guys don't even own a hammer anymore.

9- Men are afraid to tell someone off
Men have no problem telling everyone their childhood fantasies about their teddy bears, but ask them to be direct, blunt, and tell it like it is, and all of a sudden they belong to the United Nations. You know why? Because if they are brutally honest and forward, then someone might be brutally honest back, and heaven forbid someone tell us we're not God incarnate.

10- Men take over women's roles
When did becoming a stay-at-home dad become cool? When did being a male nurse become something guys grew up thinking of? When did being a secretary scream out "ambitious career plan"? When did holding your wife's hand while she's delivering your baby become a mandatory male experience? You want to be a wuss, do what wusses do. Be a finocchio, get ready for the backlash. You know what the worst part is? These cafones insist it's acceptable.

11- Men watch too much Oprah
Do I have to explain this one?

12- Men are whipped
The most important reason men have lost all sense of masculinity is their inability to be master of their own domain. Men have handed over the whip to their women, and allowed them to use it, liberally, frequently, and without discretion. No decision can be made without consulting the female -- your word as the final say is a running joke when you accept being second fiddle in the hierarchy chain.

So where does that take us? Where do we, as men searching for our manhood, go from here? Simple. Go to your local video store, rent anything Frankie Sinatra, Steve McQueen or Sean Connery did before 1980. See how they maintain their presence under any circumstance. See how being rough around the edges adds allure to them. See what it means to "take it like a man."

If that's too difficult for you, here are some simple rules. No matter how tough life gets, bite your lip and handle it. Don't bitch, don't complain, just move on. Be macho, don't be afraid to say something sexist if it reflects reality. Don't follow trends women like (yoga is out, boys), don't start doing jobs women are supposed to do (being a hotel maid won't get you in the country club), don't be afraid to tell people what you think (and be ready for the return punch in the nuts). Most importantly, don't go crying to your mommy or your girlfriend every time someone is "mean" to you.

Boys, it's time for us to get our balls back, it's time for us to swing the pendulum back the other way. You don't have to be a male chauvinist pig, but for crying out loud, reclaim your manhood. Be strong, be decisive, and stop watching Oprah.

Be a man.

8 Traits Of A Real Man

Today's lesson is a throwback to the good old days when school teachers still had a whip, and you were disgraced if you showed up at home with a "D" on your report card. Today is a lesson in basics; the basics of being a man. Let's call it Manhood 101 .

To build a great house, you need a strong foundation on which to put all the other pretty things. To build a great man, you also need a solid foundation on which to add all the other little things that set the real men apart from the stronzos .

If you don't agree, go read the column of some guy who thinks owning a car or a big bike is what defines a man. You'll see how far you get with his advice.

Trait #1: A real man is strong
A real man doesn't cry, doesn't moan, doesn't complain, doesn't get sick, and doesn't need to go to the doctor every time he sneezes. A real man makes decisions and lives with the consequences. A real man accepts responsibility for his actions and his words. A real man is firm. If life is a bitch, a real man will slap her and move on.

A real man is macho; a real man is tough; a real man doesn't show emotions. A real man is the backbone of his family and doesn't have time to be weak. If spiders scare you, you'll never be a real man.

Trait #2: A real man is focused
A real man knows the difference between what's important and what isn't. A real man doesn't waste time on stupidities that don't bring him any profit. Sure, there are things you can do as a hobby -- I like to shoot ducks -- but it must have a purpose. The purpose of my hobby is to improve my aim, and I don't have to tell you whether or not that's a useful thing in my line of work.

A real man focuses on power, money and family. He doesn't focus on sex. Sex comes as a result of having power, money and a wife (and if she doesn't satisfy you, there are plenty of other women who will, especially when you are powerful and rich).

Trait #3: A real man knows the importance of family
A real man will keep his family strong and pass on his ancestors' history and traditions. A real man knows that his children are God's gift and should be treated as such, even if he disciplines them from time to time.

A real man must also remember his other Family, his organization. In my world, both my family and my Family hold the same importance; I protect them both with all my might. If you have a Family, don't forget where your loyalties lie and who has your back when you need it.

Trait #4: A real man doesn't gossip
A real man keeps his mouth shut. He shelters information and rations his words. A real man does not reveal more than he has to, and doesn't engage in girlie talk about others. A real man doesn't discuss things he doesn't know about, or people he has never met.

Trait #5: A real man's word is his bond
When a real man makes a promise, he keeps it. If he can't keep a promise, he doesn't give his word. A real man would rather die than break his word. A real man knows that his words are as powerful as his actions, and must be taken at face value. That is why he rations them (see above).

Trait #6: A real man strives to be a role model
A real man respects himself and others at all times, unless, of course, he has been disrespected. A real man sets an example for his disciples and especially his children. I never bring my work home, so my children only know me as their father and not as a waste management executive. You should do the same; a real man sets the tone for his children and keeps them from discovering that he has weaknesses.

Trait #7: A real man makes his own fortune
A real man doesn't settle for handouts or charity when it comes to his personal fortune. A real man isn't satisfied with papa's money. He spits on Lady Luck and decides his own destiny. A real man who inherits the goods from his forefathers takes his inheritance and turns it into 10 times what it was.

Trait #8: A real man doesn't look like a woman
A real man doesn't have piercing and long hair, and he doesn't shave his chest. Manicures, however, are acceptable. Massages from female attendants are also tolerated. A real man knows that, outside of his barber, all his personal hygiene needs must be taken care of by a woman.

A real man has at least three suits (with a mandatory pinstriped one) that cost more than a roomful of escorts. A real man wears a suit at least three times a week. Any man who doesn't know how to tie a tie should hand in his testicoli immediately. And learn how to order a bottle; I'm sick of seeing baboons ordering Colt 45 in fine establishments.

By Mr. Mafioso

ARCHSPACE MY ANTILIFE

This is soooo trueee!

I have nothing to do right now. Wait for next articles. :) For the mean time, please enjoy your stay. :)

credits:
www.orderofatlas.com
www.archspace.org
irc.archspace.org 6667

Does Anyone Deserve A Second Chance?

So what's today's lesson? No one deserves a second chance in life, except blood (by second chance, I mean you need a change for redemption because you've screwed yourself more than a guy on death row, you've become a stool pigeon, or you've made the mistake of your life -- not because you left the milk on the counter).

Here's why almost no one deserves a second chance:

The big picture
No one around you should be weak. Requests for second chances only come from people who can't get their act together in the first place. Second chances mean someone, somewhere, disrespected you, betrayed you, or made a fool of you in some way. Loose lips and loose brains sink ships, you know what I'm saying?

Family
Family members are the only people who deserve second chances, and only because they are blood. When I say family I mean your children, your parents or your uncle; not a long-lost fourth cousin. Your wife is not your blood; she doesn't fall in this category. Even if you see yourself in the unfortunate circumstance of giving someone a second chance, that person loses all your trust. They start at zero again. You don't forgive and you don't forget, you just give the family members a chance to redeem themselves.

Close friends
Close friends don't get second chances. Anyone who is close to you should know better than to screw you. A friend proves his worth in bad times, not in good. Any stronzo who betrays you puts you in bad times. You should never be put in a position to give any friend a second chance. It violates the principle of what a friend is. Their job is to be by your side; how can they do that if you don't trust them?

Like the old saying goes; "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." F**k that; fool me once, there isn't going to be a second fooling, just some cement shoes. Track record means nothing to me, it just means I might expel you from my life instead of whacking you.

Colleagues/crew members
Now if I said you shouldn't forgive close friends, what do you think I'm going to say about people you don't even know that well? If they are not blood or even close friends, what are they? Nothing but an anecdote in my life. If a relationship is based on money, what -- if any -- loyalty do you owe a person? If you answered nessun (nothing), you get a carrot and you get to take the dunce cap off.

You take food out of my children's mouths and expect sympathy? Forget about it.

The women in your life
So what about your wife? Should you give her a second chance? No, she's replaceable. Her only job is to support you unconditionally, stay in the kitchen, and screw you in her younger years. Any infidelity or any other kind of betrayal and you tell her vaffanculo (how you make that happen is up to you).

What about your mistress? Again, no. She's replaceable. Her only job is to support you unconditionally, stay in the apartment you paid for, and screw you on your weekend getaways.

Your girlfriend? Second chance? No. She's replaceable. Her only job is to support you unconditionally, stay in the strip joint where she belongs, and screw you in the backseat of your car or when the mistress is out of town.

See a pattern here? Good. Now go play with your dolls.

source:
Forward email last 2-3 years ago

Abiding By Your Code Of Honor

If you want to get anywhere in life, you'll need to have some basic elements in your code of honor. I took a vow many years ago and swore to uphold a code. To break the code means a certain death. Then again, these days, it seems to mean a deal with the Feds, relocation, and a book and movie deal with HBO. For what it's worth, those rats will have their day, they deserve to be put out of order.

Anyhow, my point is that those who follow the code will do better in life because they know who they are and are being true to themselves. They will live by their code at all times. Remember, when you live by a strict code of honor, you cannot break it at any time. Always obey your code or there is no point in having one.

Here are 5 laws that should be part of your code of honor.

LAW 1: Never break your code of honor
The first and most important law is that you may never break the code under any circumstance. You've figured out the rules of the game so follow them without fail.

LAW 2: Respect yourself
Your code of honor must be based on self-respect and respect of others that follow the same code. When you break the code, you disrespect yourself and all the men that live by it. If you are a police officer, you should always uphold the law. If you break the law, you are without honor and are sullying the men on the force that do respect the code. Mind you, I'm glad there are plenty of crooked cops out there, it makes that much easier for me to do business.

LAW 3: Respect fellow warriors
When you meet someone that is your "kind of guy," it is usually because he lives by the same code that you do. You may not realize this, but it happens more often than most think. This means to show respect when it is due.

Two boxers may talk trash and even hate each other. But if they fight 12 bloody rounds to a draw, they may still not like each other, but they will shake hands (or touch gloves), look each other in the eyes, and the respect they have for one another is obvious. Thus, they show a much stronger respect amongst themselves than they would to any "outsider." They understand what it means to live by their code of battle.

LAW 4: Respect the business
Sometimes the game goes your way and sometimes it beats you down, but at all times you should respect the game. To respect it means you will think clearly, and be able to work and win. If you take the game for granted, it'll clean you out faster than you can say "boo." If you don't take care of business, then business will take care of you. Don't ever forget that.

LAW 5: Death is honorable
Be willing to die for your code. My business was able to operate and grow strong because the men of honor (back in the day anyway) would take their punishment if they broke our code or if they got caught. They were willing to pay the price to live the life. They lived by the code in good times or bad.

If you have the choice of breaking the code or dying, then you should choose death. There is no life without honor and once you break your code, you have no honor and no life, which means you might as well be dead. Thus, if you are going to bite the bullet, do so with honor.

There you have it boys, a code of honor can be as simple or as complicated as you make it. Either way, use these 5 laws as the basis of your code and you'll be off to a good start.

The Rules of Life: 25 Rules of Wisdom

The 25 rules to live by...

1- Even the boss must get his fingernails dirty.
Don't make the people under you do things you haven't done or aren't willing to do. Once in a while, I'll go out into the field with a trusted capo of mine to send a message to my crew. If you're a leader, then lead by example. How can anyone argue with you then?

2- A handful of luck is better than a mountain of wisdom.
Okay, this one isn't Sal's or mine for that matter, but it's still an important rule. As smart as you can be, there are always things in life you have to be prepared for. Even a wise man can slip on ice. Don't underestimate the power of being at the right place at the right time.

3- For every one word you say, let your enemies say 10.
Sort of like Rule 8 (you'll see it soon, shut up), but I like to emphasize this point by saying that the more you reveal to your enemy, the more weapons he has to hurt you with. Let your enemy talk because information is power, and information can destroy.

4- Cash is cash, even if it comes from an elephant's stomach.
When you have greenbacks in your hands, there are no maybes, no ifs, no credit checks, no anything. A check can always bounce, a credit card is for suckers, cash is always cash.

5- Never reveal 100% of anything to anyone.
If you have a great idea on how to become a millionaire, or how to convince the IRS that you really did only make $18,542 as a dental surgeon, never tell anyone all details of your plan. Always hold something back, reveal only 75% or 90% of the plan if you have to. It protects you (especially if that last 10% is illegal) and ensures that your great idea stays yours.

6- Never make a decision when you're angry.
Smart, careful men realize they must have a clear head to think. When you're angry, it's your boiling bloodlines that speak for you, not your logic. Control your emotions. This is one of the most important rules there is. When you're angry, you make threats you often can't deliver on, or decisions you come to regret. Don't say I didn't warn you.

7- A man is nothing without his word.
One of the few things even a poor man has is his word. Your word should never be broken. Always keep your promises (you should never make promises, but I know how some of you clowns can't stop yourselves). The minute someone doesn't trust you is the minute you lose them.

8- Keep your mouth shut. If you have to lie, keep it short and simple.
If you don't have anything smart to say, don't say anything at all. Even if you have something to say, don't say it, you just end up revealing something to the other person, giving them more ammo to shoot you with. If your mouth stays shut, mistakes go the way of the dinosaurs.

If you lie, there's no use in you coming up with some conspiracy theory. A short and sweet lie is easier to defend (and remember) than some elaborate story about how some transvestite got lipstick on your tie.

9- The best way to dodge an enemy's bullet is by never being in a position where he can hit you.
Don't put yourself in a position where you can get in trouble. Avoid being put between a rock and a hard place. Never be in the same room with your enemy and he'll never have a clear shot at your head.

10- When you can't win a war by playing fair, bend the rules. Better yet, break them.
Unless you're some salame who's as motivated as a slug, you always want to win. Winning doesn't mean you have to play by the rules. It means winning. If you want to get ahead in life, you have to learn the rules of the side game. Those who run this country learned this rule a long time ago.

11- Never forgive betrayal.
Never.

12- Whenever you're in doubt about whether an enemy should respect or fear you, always choose fear.
Respect is great, fear is better. Machiavelli made this one famous. Fear is a better deterrent than respect; fear will stop an enemy in his tracks more than respect will.

13- A woman's anger can always be subdued with a diamond ring (and a man's with sex).
Is this a sexist rule? Who gives a damn? If a woman gets a diamond, she should shut up and be happy (it worked for our grandfathers, it should work for us). As long as my wife doesn't change, this rule will always apply with me. For men, I always tell my crew: A good night with a mistress will clear your head.

14- Behind every great man is a great woman.
Just because I tell you to follow Rule 13, doesn't mean that you should disrespect your wife. You need the stability of a great woman to be great. A man without a family can never be a complete man. A mediocre wife will always stop you from fulfilling your potential.

15- Nothing lasts forever.
Whether it's love, good fortune, success in business, your looks, or your hair, nothing lasts forever. This one is self-explanatory.

16- Never give a tip to someone who isn't looking.
Whether you're in a bar being served by a hot waitress or giving a stock tip to someone at your office, don't give a big tip if -- a) the waitress isn't even looking at you or going to know it's from you; or, b) the idiot you're giving the hot stock tip to doesn't even have an investment account or a clue what Nasdaq is.

17- If you go to war, always strike first. Strike hard, and hope it's the only strike you need.
When a conflict or fight is inevitable, always strike the first blow. You will knock your enemy off balance, and if your blow was strong enough, you could knock your enemy out completely.

18- Peace is only a prelude to war.
Never be complacent. Just because everything is going great in your life now, doesn't mean it always will. Always be ready for the worst, even if you don't live as though the worst is actually happening to you.

19- Have a priest on call if you choose to be a careless man.
If you're not careful, or at least cautious in your actions or words, you're doomed to make your wife a widow or torpedo your career.

20- When in doubt, follow your gut.
Instincts were given to us so that we can make a decision when all the elements in a decision-making process aren't obvious. Listen to your gut, it'll save you more often than it'll hurt you.

21- Man appoints, God disappoints.
I never quite understood what this meant. Sal used to say it all the time, and I would just nod my head even if I didn't know what he was trying to say. I don't even think Sal knew what it meant. Still, it sounds good.

22- Keep your friends close, your enemies closer.
People always misunderstand this saying. It doesn't mean you have to be best friends with your enemy, it just means you should do everything in your power to keep tabs on your enemy. Have someone you trust in his organization. Know his moves, predict his thoughts, and capitalize on his weaknesses.

23- Overestimate the time something takes, and underestimate its rewards.
Even the best plans sometimes don't come to fruition (yeah, big word, I know). Most of the time, we have to work to get something, and that means being patient. Overestimating the work and underestimating the reward will never leave you disappointed.

24- To make money, you have to spend money.
I hate greasing all these corrupt politicians, but most of the time, I makes me 10 times more money as a result. Don't be afraid to spend money if it will bring you more. Take a loan at the bank if you have a great idea for a business. Pay a good employee a decent salary. Pay for expert advice. If you are a smart businessman, you will always come out on top.

25- Lucky is the man who suffers humiliation in front of others, for his revenge will be sweeter.
If someone ever embarrasses you, make sure he gets a good laugh; make sure people see this embarrassment because the memory will eat at you until you get your revenge. Too often, people don't retaliate when they're humiliated. Raise the stakes, and you'll have no choice but to return with a vengeance.